Ann Voskamp. Her blog still rocks my world and has since I found it a few years ago. www.aholyexperience.com This Canadian farmer’s wife and mother of six is a gifted thought-provoking writer whose little place on the web has been an immense blessing to me. If you know me well, you know how highly I recommend Ann’s writing. She is just a gift.
If you’ve been in and around the Christian community for any length of time, you have probably already heard of her best-selling book One Thousand Gifts. This book made the cut when packing our lives for Kenya and I’m just starting to read it a second time. As I cracked open the cover and began again this morning, I knew I had to devote a blog post to the book, the site & to Ann.
When you simply get up every day and live life raw – you murmur the question soundlessly… Can there be a good God? … Where is God, really?
How can He be good when babies die, and marriages implode, and dreams blow away, dust in the wind? Where is grace bestowed when cancer gnaws and loneliness aches and nameless places in us soundlessly die, break off without reason, erode away. Where hides this joy of the Lord, this God who fills the earth with good things, and how do I fully live when life is full of hurt? How do I wake up to joy and grace and beauty and all that is the fullest life when I must stay numb to losses and crushed dreams and all that empties me out? …
Is this the toxic air of this world, this atmosphere we inhale, burning into our lungs, this No, God?
No, God we won’t take what you give. No, God, your plans are a gutted, bleeding mess and I didn’t sign up for this and you really thought I’d go for this? No, God, this is ugly and this is a mess and can’t you get anything right and just haul this pain right out of here and I’ll take it from here, thanks… Doubting God’s goodness, distrusting His intent, discontented with that He’s given, we desire…
I live as though He stole what I consider rightly mine: happiest children, marriage of unending bliss… Our fall was, has always been, and always will be, that we aren’t satisfied in God and what He gives. - One Thousand Gifts, pp. 11-15
If you haven’t read it or any of her stuff, do so, and let the Holy Spirit speak through her, His vessel.